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Monday, September 28, 2009
Why do they look so sweet when they're sleeping?
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Saturday is a special day...
Thursday, September 24, 2009
More About Ari
I woke up this morning and checked my email as I always do. Travis sent me a touching email he shared with four of his closest childhood friends. The tears flowed as I read his words. It is truly impossible to understand what a parent who is fighting for the life of their child must be going through. I will post parts of that email as I get time throughout the day to edit it. It's beautiful.
Check http://www.prayforari.blogspot.com/ for updates.
I am going to start working in St. George again next week and will be away from my children for four nights each week. My heart was aching as I thought of having to leave them. But, knowing it will only be temporary and will get our family to a better place, we have chosen to make the sacrifice now.
I still remember the quote that President Jones had on the wall of the seminary for all of the four years I attended. It read, "Sacrifice is trading what we want most for the moment, for what we want most in the end." That may not be exact, but that is the closest I remember it.
After Travis' email, I not only felt a sliver of his pain, I felt that I should be grateful that my situation is not the same as his. It's funny how we keep hearing that. Travis and Haley were glad they weren't in Vicki's shoes; and Vicki was glad she wasn't in their's. My friend, Lisa (Hamilton) West, always made the comment clear back in high school that if we all threw our trials into a pile and could go and pick out the ones we wanted, we would still probably take ours over someone else's.
I know people who have lived through some of life's hardest trials, and they always say, "I wouldn't trade this experience for anything." I think that is because through our greatest trials we also receive our greatest blessings. I know that Travis and Haley testify daily of the blessings they have received from this trial. Certainly, they would not have chosen it, but they have such a positive outlook they not only are leaving a legacy for their children, but for those who watch their example.
I don't think anyone who knows of their situation has not taken time to reflect on their own lives. Perhaps even hear their own murmurs and complaints. Hopefully, you have also felt gratitude as you thank the Lord for all of the blessings in your own life. This experience has touched me and I am thankful to Travis and Haley for sharing it with so many people. They are angels whose lights are shining bright, not only for their daughter, Ari, but for everyone else as well.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
It's library day
Yesterday, Madison threw a fit. She is so good when she's good, and so bad when she is bad. It's strange. Porter justs stays in the gray area. Not too helpful, but not too bad. (Okay, sometimes he crosses over to the bad side.) Madison started throwing a tantrum. I have been giving her a warning when she does this and then I send her to her room to calm down. I was sitting by her yesterday and she started jumping up and down. She was throwing a tantrum. I said, "Madison, calm down or you will go to your room."
"No!!!!" She wailed and then jumped right into my lip. It split right open. And, instantly started swelling like a balloon. Not one for pain, I mean I purposely skipped all of the labor pains, I was dying. I wished I still had some percocet pills left. I iced it, put anbesol on it, and took ibuprofen. Then, took pictures and text them to people I thought I could get sympathy from. Okay, I sent one to Brant (bad idea) and one to Vicki. Vicki was sympathetic. Brant sent a big "LOL" back to me. He thought it was hilarious. I had to lie down for awhile. While I was moaning in pain, Madison came into my room and said very sweetly, "Mom, I really didn't mean to do that to your lip. I'm sorry."
Today she told me, "Mom, I just wanted you to hug me yesterday." I told her I would make a note of that in the future. My lip is still fat. If it was even, it wouldn't be so bad. But, I have an "A" cup on the left side of my lip and a "DD" on the right. It is even bruised on the front of my skin below the lip. Really, she got me good.
Monday, September 21, 2009
The twins in nursery
The Circus is In Town!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Baby Isabella
Grandma Smith Squared
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Madi, Madi
My Little Lane
It's Been A Walk In the Park

Friday, September 11, 2009
Hot Date with Grandma and Grandpa
My in-laws are so cool. They do so much stuff with the kids. The twins got a "hot date" with them on Wednesday night. They took them to Chuck E. Cheese and out to Golden Spoon afterwards. They were so tired when they came home, it was like they were slippinginto a coma.
I almost planned a date with Brant since they were going to be gone. Then we realized we didn't have to go out to be alone--we would be home alone. It was relaxing.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Dawn takes more than grease out of your way
But this little adversity gave me an opportunity to discover an often overlooked miracle. That is the magic of dish detergent. I can't figure out what is in it that makes it work so well. Let me give you a little more info. In light of being out of dish detergent, I decided to replace it with my Tide laundry soap. I had plenty of that. I know what you're thinking. That will overflow the dish washer with suds. Already thought of that...or rather remembered what happened when I did that to my Mom's dishwasher back in high school. So I used just a tiny bit. It worked okay, but just didn't do the same job. I couldn't wait until I had $4.28 to get my 11 ounces of Cascade. It would beautifully. But why? Why does it work?
You know me. I can't let a dead dog die, I mean I actually looked up why there are no B batteries. See this post: http://lizlanehibbard.blogspot.com/2009/01/i-just-couldnt-let-it-go.html.
Fortunately, in this day and age a new "Idol" has immerged for us to "speak" to and idolize. I mean the Greeks and the Romans may have had their share of "Gods" but could they ask them questions and get answers. No, they just made up stories about why things happened they way they did. If I were a Roman way back when, I would have to create a dishwasher God. And then create some story about his "magic dust" that made dishes. Or maybe it would be a goddess. Yea, much more likely to be the Dishwasher Goddess. Our modern god is none other than "Google: the god of all knowledge." Here's what I found:
Dishwashing detergent contains approximately 30 percent phosphates. Phosphates remove calcium that can build up on the dishes. The chemical also causes food to break apart and dissolve. It aids in preventing the accumulation of hard water on the dishes and silverware.
The detergent also uses enzymes in its composition. The enzymes dissolve food deposits, oil and collections of fat. They break down the deposits on the cellular level by loosening the peptides and proteins of food and fat.
Detergents use bleach and 5 percent surfactants to clean and further break down fat. The bleaching agents are chlorine based and clean the items washed as well as dissolve food deposits. The surfactants liquefy oils and fats, and stop water spotting as the items dry.
By the way, in my bit of research I discovered that dish detergent will help remove grass stains. There was some scientific basis for it, but that's way over my head. I hope you find this as interesting as I did. Yes....sometimes too much free time on my hands. I know. Maybe now you'll understand the freaky dynamics of the brain that Madison has inherited from me.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
They say you always have one child just like yourself
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MADI: Mom, I would like ice cream for breakfast.
ME: No, Madi. Ice cream is not good for your body.
MADI: It is too good for my body! My body loves it.
ME: Madi, you don't understand health and nutrition. You don't know what you're talking about.
MADI: (insulted) I do to understand! It is good. I know it's good. It has chocolate chips in it.
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ME: Hablo Espanol un pequita. Do you know what I said? I said I speak Spanish a little.
MADI: Don't talk like that. Spanish is a bad word.
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During our closing prayer, while the missionaries were over Madison walked into the room. In a LOUD whisper she said: What are they doing, Mom?
ME: They're praying.
MADI: Oh...for you? (As if I needed some prayers)
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This is in reference to her favorite movie, Land Before Time.
MADI: Mom, Cera's dad is very angry. He is always mad. I should teach him to be nice.
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MADI: Grandma, when are you going to take me on a hot date?
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I was trying to get Lane to watch Porter pee on the toilet. They were both standing there naked (getting ready to take a bath). I was explaining to Lane what Porter was doing. Then I put him on the toilet. I could see Madison watching us. She has always had a litte penis envy. She still doesn't understand why she doesn't have one. So I know her little mind was tick-tocking. When we were done she hopped up on the toilet and announced, "Oh yeah! Look what my vagina can do!" (Has anyone in the history of the world EVER said that?
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I know she has more. She says stuff every day that cracks me up.
Confessions of a Binky Addict
He "disappeared" for awhile and I could not find him in the house. I was calling his name and looking for him. I finally found him--curled up on the bathroom floor--with the binky he found.
Water Park
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
New Blog Just for Ari
ARI: Thanks for the prayers
Ari: Comments from Donalyn
Anyway the doctors at Primary Children's Hospital said that would have been one of the first signs of this LCH. Travis told me last night that there are only about 50 cases of this in the US. It is so rare, that is why doctors miss it. When Travis and Haley can, I would like to see them put something together with all the symptoms. We can email the information around to everyone to help bring more awareness. Also, to help make the doctors more aware of it. If the doctors could have caught this earlier her case could be much better. It is just so new so they don't know.
Thanks for doing the blog so people can keep up on everything. Travis had me bring the kids up there so Him and Haley could come outside and see them. It was good for the kids to see them and be able to ask questions. They had a really good visit. I may have a few pictures that I can forward you.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Ari's Updates for Monday
Monday, September 7. 9:49 a.m. VICKI: Much better night. The drs. said she is stable. Mom said for the next few days there won't be much news unless she turns for the worse because they are doing a low grade chemo on her. It will take 2-3 days before they know if it's helping. At that point if it's not working then they have to do an aggressive high dose chemo. So hopefully no turns for the worse. I'm finding out why she is swollen. Mom hasn't text me back on that one. Oh and they can't give her tylenol anymore for the pain because her liver is too enlarged and struggling.
Ari's Update

Sunday, September 6. 11:01 a.m. VICKI: Bad night. She was moved to ICU. Her platelets are suppose to be 150. Hers are 8. She is having another blood transfusion. They did get the pick line in this morning. They are aggressively going to treat the LCH. They aren't waiting for anymore tests to come back. They said they are in emergency mode so they will start treatment without confirmations.
Saturday, September 5. 5:46 p.m. VICKI: The pick line was unsuccessful. They tried for over an hour, but her veins were too little. They couldn't get it in. They are going to try again in the morning so she's going back to getting poked every four hours. Mom said the poor thing falls asleep everytime right before they come in again.
Saturday, September 5. 1:21 p.m. VICKI: Ari is having a pick ?? placed at 3:00 I'm not familiar with it. But I guess they install a line in her that is like a tube that goes directly to her heart so when she has medication given to her she won't be poked everytime. My Mom said that her veins are so hard to find that it's been awful every time they have to give her medicien and right now that's every 4 hours. To have the pick installed is a surgery with general anesthesia, but it will be better for her.
Saturday, September 5. 9:58 a.m. VICKI: Drs. haven't said anything. but Ron was just reading about it. He said that he found a more medically based website (he kept reading words that I couldn't pronounce.) Anyway, it listed a spectrum of the cancer. The good end is a focal LCH where it has affected one area. That has an 80-90% survival. However multi-symptom (and the more symptoms you have the worse) is at the far end of the spectrum and it has a less than 50% survival rate because it gets into all of the organs and starts shutting them down. She has every single symptom...and she has the lesions on the brain, enlarged liver and spleen, and fluid in the lungs. My Mom said they asked one of the drs. last night what the chances of survival were and she wouldn't give them an answer.
Friday, September 4. 6:55 p.m. TRAVIS: http://www.cancerbackup.org.uk/cancertype/childrenscancers/Typesofchildrenscancers/Langerhanscellhistiocytosis
Friday, September 4. 6:53 p.m. TRAVIS: If anyone wants to read up on what the doctors believe Ari has this site explains it the best. I will send it in the following text.
Friday, September 4, 2009 4:58 p.m.
VICKI (in Alaska): Well they have some answers. It's not leukemia it's actually worse. It's cancer and it's called LCH. They said it's really hard to explain it. The best thing they said to do is google LCH. She is scheduled for a cat scan tomorrow. They have to see where it has spread. It is treated with chemo but they didn't give any statistics.
Thursday, September 3, 2009 4:27 p.m. JAKE: Hey. We are breaking the fast now.
September 2, 2009 6:15 p.m.
HALEY: We are starting another fast for Ari. Her surgery is at 2:30 so we will end it at 5. Tell anyone you want. They think she has leukemia. Thanks.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Ari's Sedation prior to Pick Surgery
This is video of Ari getting her medication to be sedated before going into surgery. Haley is with her. We were able to watch her on Skype and my camera video taped my computer screen. The technology is pretty cool. I wish it was video of something different than this, but grateful to "be" there anyway.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
And here's Lane...
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Another accident streak for Madi
I am thankful for the fleas
My visiting teacher once shared an incredible story she read in a book about the Holocaust. It was about two sisters who ended up in a concentration camp. One sister was humble, grateful, and full of faith in God’s plan for her. The other sister, though, was more like the rest of us—struggling to be thankful in the face of their horrible situation. Somehow, they managed to smuggle a Bible into the camp, and it became their lifeline. They loved reading from it together.
One day, as they were reading, the humble sister came across a passage that said to give thanks to God in all circumstances. The other sister couldn’t believe it. She asked, “How can we possibly be thankful for this?” But the humble sister started listing all the things they could be thankful for. She said they could be grateful that they were together when so many families had been separated. They could be thankful that they had smuggled the Bible in and could share the word of God with the other women in the camp. She was even thankful for being surrounded by so many other women because it gave them a chance to bring hope to others.
The other sister, still doubtful, shot back, “And what about the fleas? Are we supposed to be thankful for them too?” Their bunkhouse was infested with fleas, and every night, they’d crawl into bed and feel tiny bites on their legs. It seemed impossible to see any good in that.
But the humble sister, without hesitation, said, “Yes, even for the fleas. They are part of God’s plan, too.”
Later, when they were released from the camp, they learned something incredible. Their bunkhouse had been the only one with such a terrible flea problem, and because of it, the soldiers refused to enter. The fleas had kept them safe from the verbal and physical abuse that other prisoners endured. As awful as they seemed at the time, the fleas turned out to be a blessing.
This story really stuck with me and humbled me as I thought about my own complaints and murmuring. Maybe the trials we face—no matter how unpleasant—are actually protections we can’t see in the moment. It reminded me that God knows what each of us needs and that we have to trust Him, even when it’s hard.
Now, whenever life feels overwhelming, I remind myself of that story. I remind myself to be thankful for the fleas.