Why do they look so sweet when they're sleeping?

My little boys love to sleep together. Last night Porter told me he was sleeping with Lane because he loves his brother.

Saturday is a special day...

...especially when your husband tells you to go back to bed--he'll take care of the kids. Wow! I loved it. After two extra hours of sleep I couldn't sleep any longer. I decided to get up and found him getting all three kids ready to go the park. I was kid-free until noon today. What a break. And, he's watching the kids tonight while Rhonda and I go to the Relief Society Broadcast. I am so lucky.

More About Ari

Written by Elizabeth (Lane) Hibbard

I woke up this morning and checked my email as I always do. Travis sent me a touching email he shared with four of his closest childhood friends. The tears flowed as I read his words. It is truly impossible to understand what a parent who is fighting for the life of their child must be going through. I will post parts of that email as I get time throughout the day to edit it. It's beautiful.
Check http://www.prayforari.blogspot.com/ for updates.
I am going to start working in St. George again next week and will be away from my children for four nights each week. My heart was aching as I thought of having to leave them. But, knowing it will only be temporary and will get our family to a better place, we have chosen to make the sacrifice now.
I still remember the quote that President Jones had on the wall of the seminary for all of the four years I attended. It read, "Sacrifice is trading what we want most for the moment, for what we want most in the end." That may not be exact, but that is the closest I remember it.
After Travis' email, I not only felt a sliver of his pain, I felt that I should be grateful that my situation is not the same as his. It's funny how we keep hearing that. Travis and Haley were glad they weren't in Vicki's shoes; and Vicki was glad she wasn't in their's. My friend, Lisa (Hamilton) West, always made the comment clear back in high school that if we all threw our trials into a pile and could go and pick out the ones we wanted, we would still probably take ours over someone else's.
I know people who have lived through some of life's hardest trials, and they always say, "I wouldn't trade this experience for anything." I think that is because through our greatest trials we also receive our greatest blessings. I know that Travis and Haley testify daily of the blessings they have received from this trial. Certainly, they would not have chosen it, but they have such a positive outlook they not only are leaving a legacy for their children, but for those who watch their example.
I don't think anyone who knows of their situation has not taken time to reflect on their own lives. Perhaps even hear their own murmurs and complaints. Hopefully, you have also felt gratitude as you thank the Lord for all of the blessings in your own life. This experience has touched me and I am thankful to Travis and Haley for sharing it with so many people. They are angels whose lights are shining bright, not only for their daughter, Ari, but for everyone else as well.

It's library day

Teaching the days of the week has been alot of work. We actually have to do an activity every day to help them think about what day it is. We christened Tuesday library day as that is a good day for the Toddler story time. I usually put Lane down for a nap and leave him with grandma. (She is so awesome.) Then, it's me and the twins. They really love the singing and dancing and story reading. We stayed a little longer today. I let them play with puzzles and read books. I decided to re-organize their puzzles. They were a mess. I know they'll be messed up again next week, but I thought maybe I could help.

Yesterday, Madison threw a fit. She is so good when she's good, and so bad when she is bad. It's strange. Porter justs stays in the gray area. Not too helpful, but not too bad. (Okay, sometimes he crosses over to the bad side.) Madison started throwing a tantrum. I have been giving her a warning when she does this and then I send her to her room to calm down. I was sitting by her yesterday and she started jumping up and down. She was throwing a tantrum. I said, "Madison, calm down or you will go to your room."

"No!!!!" She wailed and then jumped right into my lip. It split right open. And, instantly started swelling like a balloon. Not one for pain, I mean I purposely skipped all of the labor pains, I was dying. I wished I still had some percocet pills left. I iced it, put anbesol on it, and took ibuprofen. Then, took pictures and text them to people I thought I could get sympathy from. Okay, I sent one to Brant (bad idea) and one to Vicki. Vicki was sympathetic. Brant sent a big "LOL" back to me. He thought it was hilarious. I had to lie down for awhile. While I was moaning in pain, Madison came into my room and said very sweetly, "Mom, I really didn't mean to do that to your lip. I'm sorry."

Today she told me, "Mom, I just wanted you to hug me yesterday." I told her I would make a note of that in the future. My lip is still fat. If it was even, it wouldn't be so bad. But, I have an "A" cup on the left side of my lip and a "DD" on the right. It is even bruised on the front of my skin below the lip. Really, she got me good.

The twins in nursery

I took the camera to church on Sunday because Rhonda was taking pictures of the young women. When I was in the nursery, I took a picture of the kids.

The Circus is In Town!

I guess in Vegas the Circus is always in town. Brant took the twins and left Lane home with me. Lane and I walked to the library, while they were gone. They had so much fun. Porter has been talking about the man who flew out of the cannon for days. Brant snuck the kids into the V.I.P. seating area. He said it was no small task to outsmart the Shriners that were ushering the event. Actually, he said there was no one sitting in the V.I.P. section, so he thought he'd upgrade himself and the kids.

Baby Isabella

Isabella is my niece. Her mom, Heather, is Brant's youngest half-sister. We get to have her around alot because Heather is trying to finish High School and also has a full-time job.

She is only 5 months younger than Lane, so sometimes I feel like I have two sets of twins.

She is a sweetheart. She fits right in with all of the kids and loves to be around everyone. We've "picniced" dinner in the back yard the last two days because it has been so cool outside. (76 degrees) Bella joined us and helped clean the plates.

Grandma Smith Squared

Grandma Vivian Smith with some of her grandchildren. (l to r) Lane, Madison, Isabella Rosales, and Porter.

The twins and Lane love this Grandma Rhonda Smith. She does so much with them. They think they have the coolest grandma in the world. She let's them jump on her bed.

The kids are lucky to have so many grandparents. They are very loved! Madison knows how to kiss up.

Madi, Madi

What a little bundle of intelligence. This girl can not get enough of learning. She wants to read so bad. I have her practicing her alphabet now. She has almost gotten all of it down as far as being able to recognize each letter.

She's a smart little manipulator too. She wanted to go back to the library one day and we had already gone the day before. To try and convince me to take her back, she said, "Mom, we didn't thank our teacher yesterday. We need to go back and tell her thank you."

She is an extremely good Little Mama. She takes care of everyone. She loves to feed Isabella and take care of Lane. She just bosses Porter around. She is also my "Sergeant of Arms" reminding everyone of what the family rules are. No yelling, no hitting, and Mom is in charge. She often points her finger at her little brothers and says, "You listen to your Mudder! She is in charge." She looks at me for approval.

I forgot to mention this earlier, but about a month ago she informed me that she wasn't going to wear diapers to bed anymore. I was a little nervous, but she insisted that she didn't need them. Because we have mattress protectors, I told her we would try it and see how it goes. It's been about a month now and she has had four accidents. She is very upset when she does this. Last night, she was so excited because her "body woke her up to go to the bathroom." And, Porter, he'll probably be wearing a diaper to bed for a long time. He thinks being able to pee in bed is great.

She definitely has a stubborn streak and is very headstrong. It's be a challenge to work with her on some things

My Little Lane

He is such a character. I can't quite figure him out yet. He has this silent, but deadly personality. He will wander around the house very quietly, then you find out what he's been getting into. He dotes on his cousin Isabella, who is 5 months younger than him. He loves to follow the twins around and thinks he is as big as they are.

He's still only got his front 8 teeth. However, his teeth are starting to come in in the back. Bumps on the bottom, and teeth actually coming through on the top. He has been slow to get all of this teeth. He is very much a jokester and loves to play jokes on people. He's not as funny as he thinks he is. He's actually funny because he's trying to be funny. He thinks he can scare people. He let's out this little, "Baa!!" I think he is trying to say, "Boo!" If you're not paying attention you hardly notice his little roar. But if you pretend he scared the dickens out of you when he does it, he thinks it's hilarious.

He is alot like Brant. A total daredevil and thrill seeker. He is also quietly mischievous. But, he's also very sensitive and loves to give everyone kisses. He has a problem hitting you in the face when he wants to tell you that he loves you. Usually, he kisses you then hits you. Brant said he understands him completely. Wow! Okay, therapy already.

I am excited that he will be old enough to go into nursery soon. His first day is November 22nd--Brian's birthday. Can't wait. It will be strange that I will have three little ones in nursery at the same time. They're all movin' on up!

We took him out of his crib this past week. It was rough at first, but he seems to be getting the hang of it now. He sleeps in bed with Porter. Porter was much happier about it than he was. Porter likes to try to climb inside of people, he loves them so much. Lane, on the other hand doesn't like his feet covered or anyone to be touching him. (Not even me.) He's a very rude bed buddy. He has "allowed" Porter to sleep next to him. Porter tries so hard to get as close as he can, but Lane puts the kabosh on too much closeness. He probably thinks it's gay to sleep that close to his brother. That's what Brant would think.

He wants to go "bye-bye" with whomever is leaving out the door. On the rare occasion he does get to go, he is tickled pink. He has learned to open the front door, so we have to be very careful and lock it. The other day I heard the front door shut and when I went to check it, he had let himself back IN! He was covered in mud and had been playing in the flower bed. I am just glad he didn't wander down the street.

He doesn't have any attachments to blankies or binkies like Madison and Porter did. He's just his own little mold. He is a great little baby of the family.

It's Been A Walk In the Park

I have not been keeping up with all of the blogging I need to be doing. I know I often write to the masses, but really the true purpose of my blog is to keep a journal.

We are glad to see the hot Vegas summer come to an end. We are starting in the Fall climate that we love! Mornings have been 72 to 76 degrees. And trust me, after a scorching summer that is a refreshing cool.

We took the kids to the water park for Family Night on Monday. That's where I took this picture. Brant is SO good with the kids. They love playing with him.

We are still struggling with money. I can't complain though, it's not such a bad trial. We have our family and our health. I am grateful for that. I am being very picky about jobs that I am applying for. I want to find the perfect one that will work with our family schedule. We definitely NEED--not just want the extra money. But, we also want to find something that will work around the kids schedule and allow them to be with one parent most of the time.

The kids are growing and changing so fast. The twins are getting smarter every day. Madison is just too much fun. I think I like her intellectual side. Can a three year old be your best friend? She's like a mini-me so we have a good time talking. Yesterday at the library she started organizing the Disney cart of books. She was dismayed that the Princess books were not all in one section. She didn't stop until she went through every bin and and put them in the right place. She makes me so proud.

I have been helping the kids do a kitchen chore every morning after breakfast. Madison is in charge of cleaning the counter where they eat and Porter has to sweep the floor under their chairs. This morning, Madison came downstairs and frustrated said, "Hey! I just cleaned this counter! Who messed it up?" Spoken like a real woman.

Yesco, where Brant works, has already had two layoffs this year. They have a third one scheduled for Friday. Brant found out yesterday, that he won't be getting laid off. That's good news.

I have been working on Ari's blog (http://www.prayforari.blogspot.com/ ) more than my own blog. She is such a sweet little girl. I pray for their family. They are being so strong. It breaks my heart to see their story. But, they are setting an example of strength for all of us.

I've thought about taking up writing again. I do love to write. I just need to get focused.

I guess that's it. Everything is in the following pictures I'll post.

Hot Date with Grandma and Grandpa

I have been trying to teach the twins about the days of the week. So we have 7 8-1/2 x 11 different colored sheets of paper in a row on the wall. They each have the day printed on the top of them. We put a photo on each paper in relation to what is going on that day. For example, Dad's picture is on each day Monday through Friday. That means Dad is going to work. On Monday is family night; Tuesday is Library day; Friday is pizza day; and Saturday, we have a picture of the park. So Wednesday night we put a picture of Grandma and Grandpa up.
My in-laws are so cool. They do so much stuff with the kids. The twins got a "hot date" with them on Wednesday night. They took them to Chuck E. Cheese and out to Golden Spoon afterwards. They were so tired when they came home, it was like they were slippinginto a coma.
I almost planned a date with Brant since they were going to be gone. Then we realized we didn't have to go out to be alone--we would be home alone. It was relaxing.

Dawn takes more than grease out of your way

So last pay period...we hit broke about a week before pay day. I mean really broke. Zero balance in the savings, checking, and credit cards. Too many trips to St. George in the last month and not enough income. We ran out of dish detergent and trash bags and seriously had no money to buy any. I was literally digging up change around the house just to buy a gallon of milk.

But this little adversity gave me an opportunity to discover an often overlooked miracle. That is the magic of dish detergent. I can't figure out what is in it that makes it work so well. Let me give you a little more info. In light of being out of dish detergent, I decided to replace it with my Tide laundry soap. I had plenty of that. I know what you're thinking. That will overflow the dish washer with suds. Already thought of that...or rather remembered what happened when I did that to my Mom's dishwasher back in high school. So I used just a tiny bit. It worked okay, but just didn't do the same job. I couldn't wait until I had $4.28 to get my 11 ounces of Cascade. It would beautifully. But why? Why does it work?

You know me. I can't let a dead dog die, I mean I actually looked up why there are no B batteries. See this post: http://lizlanehibbard.blogspot.com/2009/01/i-just-couldnt-let-it-go.html.

Fortunately, in this day and age a new "Idol" has immerged for us to "speak" to and idolize. I mean the Greeks and the Romans may have had their share of "Gods" but could they ask them questions and get answers. No, they just made up stories about why things happened they way they did. If I were a Roman way back when, I would have to create a dishwasher God. And then create some story about his "magic dust" that made dishes. Or maybe it would be a goddess. Yea, much more likely to be the Dishwasher Goddess. Our modern god is none other than "Google: the god of all knowledge." Here's what I found:

Dishwashing detergent contains approximately 30 percent phosphates. Phosphates remove calcium that can build up on the dishes. The chemical also causes food to break apart and dissolve. It aids in preventing the accumulation of hard water on the dishes and silverware.
The detergent also uses enzymes in its composition. The enzymes dissolve food deposits, oil and collections of fat. They break down the deposits on the cellular level by loosening the peptides and proteins of food and fat.

Detergents use bleach and 5 percent surfactants to clean and further break down fat. The bleaching agents are chlorine based and clean the items washed as well as dissolve food deposits. The surfactants liquefy oils and fats, and stop water spotting as the items dry.

By the way, in my bit of research I discovered that dish detergent will help remove grass stains. There was some scientific basis for it, but that's way over my head. I hope you find this as interesting as I did. Yes....sometimes too much free time on my hands. I know. Maybe now you'll understand the freaky dynamics of the brain that Madison has inherited from me.

They say you always have one child just like yourself

Madison is "my" child. I have to say I am quit entertained by her intelligence and logic. She cracks us all up. It is very difficult to have an argument with her. And, she does not settle for "...because I said so." Her brain is in a different sphere. Here are some examples.
_____
MADI: Mom, I would like ice cream for breakfast.
ME: No, Madi. Ice cream is not good for your body.
MADI: It is too good for my body! My body loves it.
ME: Madi, you don't understand health and nutrition. You don't know what you're talking about.
MADI: (insulted) I do to understand! It is good. I know it's good. It has chocolate chips in it.
_____
ME: Hablo Espanol un pequita. Do you know what I said? I said I speak Spanish a little.
MADI: Don't talk like that. Spanish is a bad word.
_____
During our closing prayer, while the missionaries were over Madison walked into the room. In a LOUD whisper she said: What are they doing, Mom?
ME: They're praying.
MADI: Oh...for you? (As if I needed some prayers)
_____
This is in reference to her favorite movie, Land Before Time.
MADI: Mom, Cera's dad is very angry. He is always mad. I should teach him to be nice.
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MADI: Grandma, when are you going to take me on a hot date?
_____
I was trying to get Lane to watch Porter pee on the toilet. They were both standing there naked (getting ready to take a bath). I was explaining to Lane what Porter was doing. Then I put him on the toilet. I could see Madison watching us. She has always had a litte penis envy. She still doesn't understand why she doesn't have one. So I know her little mind was tick-tocking. When we were done she hopped up on the toilet and announced, "Oh yeah! Look what my vagina can do!" (Has anyone in the history of the world EVER said that?
_____

I know she has more. She says stuff every day that cracks me up.

Confessions of a Binky Addict

Porter has found some old binky's. My goodness, when we got him to "give up" the binky, we had to pry the binkies from his cold, dead hands to get him to quit. We got rid of all of them. Somehow he found some. Poor Lane never got to enjoy the bliss of a binky because Porter was, I mean IS, so addicted to them he would steal them. He has even taken them from other babies. Early signs of addiction tendencies. Oh no! Hope this is not a sign of future problems.

He "disappeared" for awhile and I could not find him in the house. I was calling his name and looking for him. I finally found him--curled up on the bathroom floor--with the binky he found.

This video clip is of me trying to get Porter to admit he has a problem. Because admitting you have a problem is the first step. It's funny.

Water Park

We have been talking about taking the kids to a water park all summer and of course, just never got around too it. It's still blazing hot in Vegas in September so I took them to a park less than 5 miles from our house. It was a perfect recommendation from my FIL, Wayne. Thanks! Brant was out of town helping with a car show. We had a good time. I would love to go there again.

New Blog Just for Ari

I am realizing there is such an important journey to document, that the entirety of it does not belong on my blog. I want to have a special blog for Ari. Please encourage and share the address with anyone who wants to keep up with her. And, please, remember to pray for her. I know the power of prayer works. She needs a whole of prayers if she is going to make it. The new address is: www.prayforari.blogspot.com

ARI: Thanks for the prayers

I have heard so many wonderful supportive thoughts from so many people. You certainly learn how far your web of life spans when there is a crisis. I am thankful to so many of our "Page" family who has sent me notes. I will forward them to Travis and Haley. Though the Page people have spread out across the globe, they are always so close and tight knit. Thank you to everyone. And please...don't stop praying. Miracles can happen. Also, please share this blog address with anyone you know who many know Travis and Haley and would like to join in praying on their behalf.

Ari: Comments from Donalyn

September 8, 2009 10:37 AM. From DONALYN (LANE) SHOCK: Liz, one of the first signs was the break out on her head back in May or June. Remember at the Family reunion? Haley took her to a Dr. and he said it was Cradle Cap and gave her medicine. But, it never cleared up. I think Haley took her in a secound time but you will need to double check that.
Anyway the doctors at Primary Children's Hospital said that would have been one of the first signs of this LCH. Travis told me last night that there are only about 50 cases of this in the US. It is so rare, that is why doctors miss it. When Travis and Haley can, I would like to see them put something together with all the symptoms. We can email the information around to everyone to help bring more awareness. Also, to help make the doctors more aware of it. If the doctors could have caught this earlier her case could be much better. It is just so new so they don't know.
Thanks for doing the blog so people can keep up on everything. Travis had me bring the kids up there so Him and Haley could come outside and see them. It was good for the kids to see them and be able to ask questions. They had a really good visit. I may have a few pictures that I can forward you.

Ari's Updates for Monday

Monday, September 7. 10:06 a.m. VICKI: This is what the swelling is from. FWD: (from Mom) Partly the steroids and her liver is enlarged.

Monday, September 7. 9:49 a.m. VICKI: Much better night. The drs. said she is stable. Mom said for the next few days there won't be much news unless she turns for the worse because they are doing a low grade chemo on her. It will take 2-3 days before they know if it's helping. At that point if it's not working then they have to do an aggressive high dose chemo. So hopefully no turns for the worse. I'm finding out why she is swollen. Mom hasn't text me back on that one. Oh and they can't give her tylenol anymore for the pain because her liver is too enlarged and struggling.

Ari's Update

For those of you who don't know, my brother Travis' daughter, Ari, has been diagnosed with LCH. She is currently in Primary Children's Hospital. They have so many people who care about them and are praying for them. I put the information on my blog so that those who would like, may read about how she is doing. Jaymi also summed up her history and condition really well...I won't try to recreate it. http://kingskourt.blogspot.com/

Her history as transmitted via text messages to the family. Most recent texts are posted first in the reading order:

Sunday, September 6. 11:01 a.m. VICKI: Bad night. She was moved to ICU. Her platelets are suppose to be 150. Hers are 8. She is having another blood transfusion. They did get the pick line in this morning. They are aggressively going to treat the LCH. They aren't waiting for anymore tests to come back. They said they are in emergency mode so they will start treatment without confirmations.

Saturday, September 5. 5:46 p.m. VICKI: The pick line was unsuccessful. They tried for over an hour, but her veins were too little. They couldn't get it in. They are going to try again in the morning so she's going back to getting poked every four hours. Mom said the poor thing falls asleep everytime right before they come in again.
Saturday, September 5. 1:21 p.m. VICKI: Ari is having a pick ?? placed at 3:00 I'm not familiar with it. But I guess they install a line in her that is like a tube that goes directly to her heart so when she has medication given to her she won't be poked everytime. My Mom said that her veins are so hard to find that it's been awful every time they have to give her medicien and right now that's every 4 hours. To have the pick installed is a surgery with general anesthesia, but it will be better for her.

Saturday, September 5. 9:58 a.m. VICKI: Drs. haven't said anything. but Ron was just reading about it. He said that he found a more medically based website (he kept reading words that I couldn't pronounce.) Anyway, it listed a spectrum of the cancer. The good end is a focal LCH where it has affected one area. That has an 80-90% survival. However multi-symptom (and the more symptoms you have the worse) is at the far end of the spectrum and it has a less than 50% survival rate because it gets into all of the organs and starts shutting them down. She has every single symptom...and she has the lesions on the brain, enlarged liver and spleen, and fluid in the lungs. My Mom said they asked one of the drs. last night what the chances of survival were and she wouldn't give them an answer.

Friday, September 4. 6:55 p.m. TRAVIS: http://www.cancerbackup.org.uk/cancertype/childrenscancers/Typesofchildrenscancers/Langerhanscellhistiocytosis

Friday, September 4. 6:53 p.m. TRAVIS: If anyone wants to read up on what the doctors believe Ari has this site explains it the best. I will send it in the following text.

Friday, September 4, 2009 4:58 p.m.
VICKI (in Alaska): Well they have some answers. It's not leukemia it's actually worse. It's cancer and it's called LCH. They said it's really hard to explain it. The best thing they said to do is google LCH. She is scheduled for a cat scan tomorrow. They have to see where it has spread. It is treated with chemo but they didn't give any statistics.

Thursday, September 3, 2009 4:27 p.m. JAKE: Hey. We are breaking the fast now.

September 2, 2009 6:15 p.m.
HALEY: We are starting another fast for Ari. Her surgery is at 2:30 so we will end it at 5. Tell anyone you want. They think she has leukemia. Thanks.

Ari's Sedation prior to Pick Surgery

This is video of Ari getting her medication to be sedated before going into surgery. Haley is with her. We were able to watch her on Skype and my camera video taped my computer screen. The technology is pretty cool. I wish it was video of something different than this, but grateful to "be" there anyway.

And here's Lane...

He is such a happy kid...and a little mischievous. I am afraid he is going to be like Brant. He stuck and pair of suitcase keys into an outlet a couple of days ago and of course, threw the circuit. I was close enough to it that is sparked my arm. He loves his soft blankets. He STILL only has his front eight teeth. One is slowly coming through on his upper left side. He can say quite a few words: He says "Ma" for Mom and "Mam Mam" for Grandma. It sounds very close. Only a trained mother's ear would know the difference. He also can say on and off, outside, baba (bottle), and yea, that's about it. Not very verbal yet. He climbs like a monkey and can scale any cabinet. He can get on the kitchen counter from the floor--and the bathroom counter. Yesterday, he figured out how to climb into his height chair. He moved Isabella's walker (yes it has wheels) and climbed on it to get in the chair. And, he did this while Isabella was in the height chair.

Another accident streak for Madi

Madison, unfortunately, has my accident prone-ness. This black eye she is sporting is because she turned around too fast and ran into her own dresser. The other pink spots on her face are from getting into my permanent lipstick. It DOES NOT come off! It's horrible. It's like nail polish or something. Yesterday, she slipped on the patio and fell flat on the back of her head. She has a big goose egg. I'm sorry Madi, you get that from me.

I am thankful for the fleas

My visiting teacher once shared an incredible story she read in a book about the Holocaust. It was about two sisters who ended up in a concentration camp. One sister was humble, grateful, and full of faith in God’s plan for her. The other sister, though, was more like the rest of us—struggling to be thankful in the face of their horrible situation. Somehow, they managed to smuggle a Bible into the camp, and it became their lifeline. They loved reading from it together.

One day, as they were reading, the humble sister came across a passage that said to give thanks to God in all circumstances. The other sister couldn’t believe it. She asked, “How can we possibly be thankful for this?” But the humble sister started listing all the things they could be thankful for. She said they could be grateful that they were together when so many families had been separated. They could be thankful that they had smuggled the Bible in and could share the word of God with the other women in the camp. She was even thankful for being surrounded by so many other women because it gave them a chance to bring hope to others.

The other sister, still doubtful, shot back, “And what about the fleas? Are we supposed to be thankful for them too?” Their bunkhouse was infested with fleas, and every night, they’d crawl into bed and feel tiny bites on their legs. It seemed impossible to see any good in that.

But the humble sister, without hesitation, said, “Yes, even for the fleas. They are part of God’s plan, too.”

Later, when they were released from the camp, they learned something incredible. Their bunkhouse had been the only one with such a terrible flea problem, and because of it, the soldiers refused to enter. The fleas had kept them safe from the verbal and physical abuse that other prisoners endured. As awful as they seemed at the time, the fleas turned out to be a blessing.

This story really stuck with me and humbled me as I thought about my own complaints and murmuring. Maybe the trials we face—no matter how unpleasant—are actually protections we can’t see in the moment. It reminded me that God knows what each of us needs and that we have to trust Him, even when it’s hard.

Now, whenever life feels overwhelming, I remind myself of that story. I remind myself to be thankful for the fleas.